Adela Milani (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
abileunaspada) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
sunshineverse2014-07-28 02:10 pm
abileunaspada) wrote in sunshineverse2014-07-28 02:10 pm
The time is now!
Who: Adela Milani (abileunaspada) & OPEN
When: August 1st
Where: Konohagakure
What: Adela has reached the end date of her leave, and an important decision has come during the time off. Whether it is with a curious friend or with the Hokage himself, Adela is going to announce her plans and take the first true step towards her goals.
It was... Strange. She felt so calm then, more sure of herself than she suspected she ever had in her life. There wasn't anything special about that day, apart from it being ridiculously hot out (though that was normal for Konoha's summers). The exams were done, and although she had heard whispers about tensions rising between the ninja nations, there was something she knew she could do about it. The question was how the Hokage himself would take it.
At some point she stopped to get some iced coffee, sighing at the slightly bitter beverage as she shaded herself from the sun. The meeting with the Hokage wouldn't happen for a little while yet, so she could afford the stop, but... What would everyone think of her new goal? Of the ambition she had given herself to keep going, when she had failed so much before?
No. It was because she had failed so much before that she felt she could do this now. She could at least start, and find her strength her own way. Even so, there were probably a few people she'd have to talk to first - about everything.
abileunaspada) & OPENWhen: August 1st
Where: Konohagakure
What: Adela has reached the end date of her leave, and an important decision has come during the time off. Whether it is with a curious friend or with the Hokage himself, Adela is going to announce her plans and take the first true step towards her goals.
It was... Strange. She felt so calm then, more sure of herself than she suspected she ever had in her life. There wasn't anything special about that day, apart from it being ridiculously hot out (though that was normal for Konoha's summers). The exams were done, and although she had heard whispers about tensions rising between the ninja nations, there was something she knew she could do about it. The question was how the Hokage himself would take it.
At some point she stopped to get some iced coffee, sighing at the slightly bitter beverage as she shaded herself from the sun. The meeting with the Hokage wouldn't happen for a little while yet, so she could afford the stop, but... What would everyone think of her new goal? Of the ambition she had given herself to keep going, when she had failed so much before?
No. It was because she had failed so much before that she felt she could do this now. She could at least start, and find her strength her own way. Even so, there were probably a few people she'd have to talk to first - about everything.
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After a beat looked down at her drink, frowning at it as she added more to it, "But I ended up doing that anyway. He's my cousin, Ami -- and at one time, he was my best friend."
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She stopped short, thinking of the consequences of that. Sephiroth had been promoted by the time he was Ami's age, so he couldn't have been a member of Konoha at any point. "...you abandoned him, didn't you." It wasn't a question. In fact, it might have been less accusing if it was. Or if there was any inflection in her voice at all.
"I'm not sure how you can do that sort of thing and still claim that you never intentionally did something to hurt him." Ami couldn't imagine abandoning her own cousin, aunt or uncle.
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Adela had to swallow back her feelings again, trying to calm herself again. It was still hard to think about... "I guess I should thank you, though. I wouldn't started contacting him again if it wasn't for that message."
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Ami shook her head and sighed, taking a full gulp from her drink. She really wasn't used to being talkative, but somehow Adela always created a need for it. "Especially if you have some stupid sentiment like 'I want to go back to the way things were' driving you."
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A bit harsh, perhaps, but holding back or being subtle wouldn't fix whatever problem Adela was having understanding a man who seemed to make so much sense to Ami, normally. "Patching things up is fine, but...well, with your attitude and your reactions..." Ami thought about it at length, until she figured out a way to put it that Adela might understand.
"It's like...it's like, say you and he started out at the top of a mountain. And somebody carried you all the way to the base. He isn't obligated to go down and haul your deadweight all the way back up, or even meet you half-way. No matter what the reason, you left him alone, and only started writing to him on a whim. Because of me." Ami bit her lip. "I can't guarantee anything but...he might have chosen to cut some footholds in that mountain for you. It might be your job to find them."
But given the views Ami had just expressed, she wasn't sure how much success Adela would meet on that front.
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She flicked Ami's forehead gently, not really a chide when she murmured something along the lines of "You shouldn't be so rude to your senpai you know."
Even with that, she actually started smiling again before she drained her drink and made to stand up, "But... You're right. From here, it's my job to find the footholds and climb the mountain. I don't know which ones will be right or not, but nothing's going to happen if I just keep waiting around for him. Thanks, Ami. With things like this going on, I'm starting to wonder who the wiser of us really is."
She turned to the empty cup then, swishing around the remaining droplets of iced coffee before crushing the cup in her hand and throwing it out, "Truth is... I think I already knew I had to do that, or I wouldn't have decided to come back to duty today. Still, hearing it helps."
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She took another sip of her drink, relieved at the prospect of not having to talk so much at once, until a thought occurred to her. "Don't expect him to be kind," she warned Adela. "You don't..." She tried to find a way to put it nicely. She failed. "You don't deserve that, just yet. You have to get back up to that level through your own power, first."
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"You can hate me all you want for that. I wasn't going to let them go or forgive them, even if I was going to spare their lives. But it's already happened and... There's nothing else to be done about it now."
That was another reason why she had firmed her resolve. Maybe it was wrong of her to think that way, but whether it was or not didn't matter until she'd had her chance to speak to Obito. She needed to hear his thoughts on it, and whether or not she was still fit for duty based on that.
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There was a price to letting an offender live to see another day. A price that could be the initial crime or body count doubled or tripled.
"I don't hate you, Senpai," she decided. "I didn't hate my father's teammate for sparing the man who came back with reinforcements. I didn't hate him for coming home, when my father stayed back, going down as he finished what should have been done in the first place. I guess..." She looked up, pensive. "I guess I just hope you learn instead of clinging to shining ideals, so you don't have to carry that sort of weight around until you die, too."
Her throat closed up, and she looked back down. She hated talking for so long at once.
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She left then, walking away as she took a breath and steeled herself further. The last thing she wanted to do was break down in front of the Hokage. Maybe Ami was right in that she was pig-headed, but it was the same thing she had written to Sephiroth. She had to believe, with all of her being, that her 'soft' heart was her strength instead of her weakness. That was the noble thing. That was what she'd do.