[Closed] I've had all I can take.

[scarecrowboy]

Who: Kakashi Hatake & Yamato. (Once the fight is over anyone can jump in and feel free to see them/witness the carnage or whatever. I'll make a separate comment thread when that comes about, probably.)
When: September 16.
Where: Konoha, outside Hokage Tower and then to a training ground after they've finished lowering everyone's opinion of 'capable' shinobi.
What: Kakashi has been brooding for a while now, and it's all coming to a head.



It had been the first time in his life he'd ever asked for a vacation, for a break, for a pat on the shoulder and a 'don't worry about it, Kakashi, take as long as you need'. He didn't ask for much, though he supposed a break after a few weeks of little to no mission-action was a bit of a strange ask, but since it was his first request for time off in all his years of being a shinobi, he didn't think there would be much of a problem. He probably deserved it after only ever being forced into medical leave in the past.

He'd trailed all the way up to the Hokage's Office with his paperwork that he'd avoided handing in for the past few weeks, and his excuses laid out straight and clear - a harmless visit to Uzushio to check up with his secret student and her newly acquired ninken. Obito just had to stamp and sign a goddamn scroll and everything would have been fine, but no. Upon entering the room his friend had greeted him, but when Kakashi's question aired the man had looked up at him, wilted horribly and told him that he'd only just got back from spending a month there, did he really want to go back already?

God damn it.

He could see the man was visibly crushed, could see the hesitance and the sadness in his eyes, like a kicked puppy.

Kakashi's heart had ached seeing that, and had left on a whip crack reflex, body flickering out of the tower in a puff of smoke.

The more he thought about it though, the more he couldn't stand the idea that Obito had used his weakness against him, and as he descended the stairs from the levels of the tower toward the ground floor... he only got angrier.

Comments

[mokutonno]

Yamato huffed a laugh at the notion of something like that being 'his turn' but was grateful for the sentiment at least. He nodded, sniffling wetly with emotion and hating himself so much for how close he was to tears; relief, sadness, everything finally finding an outlet and shifting that ache from under his ribs after all this time.

"I was so sure that you'd never want to see me again and then you were just there, smiling and responding like it was only yesterday.."

Yamato paused, sucking in a breath and summoning a smile from the warmth growing inside of him ".. I guess Obito did make sure we'd speak again, afterall."

[scarecrowboy]

Kakashi's eyebrows pulled together. Yamato looked so reminiscent of the gentile little thing he'd been in ANBU right now that it made Kakashi's head spin and his chest tighten. To everone around, Tenzou had seemed so dependant on Kakashi back then, but he'd also been so strong and now even though emotion seemed to be getting the better of him Kakashi could tell there was still strength there. He'd never doubt that about Yamato again, not after he'd doubted him enough to leave him and almost ruin their friendship forever. He'd had no idea how close he'd come.

"...What do you mean?" Kakashi asked, frowning just slightly at the mention of Obito. Not only did hearing his name make Kakashi's heart twinge slightly, but it also confused him that Yamato mentioned him so often. "What does Obito have to do with you and me?"

[mokutonno]

Ah..It was probably time to come clean about that too.
Yamato had the decency to look somewhat shamefaced, the threat of tears drying up enough for him to be completely honest.

"..I met Obito when I was fifteen. He'd taken an interest in the 'girl' that he'd seen you going on mission with and tailed me for almost two weeks before actually talking to me." He smiled softly at the memory and at the quiet evenings that had followed that first meeting before continuing.

"Obito kept an eye on you, all throughout ANBU and at first I thought he only wanted to talk to me to keep tabs on you but, after that first conversation, he asked very little about you and we grew close.."

Yamato bit his lip then, drawing up the memories of the night he'd gone looking for answers and swallowing thickly at the pain those thoughts still held.

"..He caught me that night. Walked right in while I was reading the mission report. He tried to dissuade me but, I was more stubborn than he expected. We talked about it and Obito tried to comfort me in his own way, saying that you were okay and healing, but it hurt more than helped.."

He trailed off then, reluctant to reveal anything more than what was necessary of that night, some things were not his to tell after all.

[scarecrowboy]

For a moment Kakashi wasn't really certain how to feel about the fact that Obito had actually been monitoring his activity in ANBU. What reason did he have to do that? ANBU was a time Kakashi didn't talk about for his own reasons - not because the memory hurt, but because that experience was his and noone else's. He didn't want to tell Obito or Gai about the things he experienced because they wouldn't understand... and that was why he'd never told them about Tenzou. That was why he didn't want them to know about Tenzou..

"He tries," Kakashi muttered, voice kind of blank as he tried to decide how he felt about the news. "But I wouldn't say he's the most comforting shoulder to cry on."

[mokutonno]

Yamato hunched his shoulders at the lack of emotion in Kakashi's voice; he'd never openly made the decision to not tell the Jounin, it had just gone by way of silent agreement between himself and Obito and that had been that. Even now, Yamato saw it as his own first steps in keeping some aspects of his life separate from others and it had served him well thus far.

"It was so hard, trying to explain just what you had meant to me, how we worked in ANBU, what wouldn't be there any more.. He did try but, nothing could replace that and so I, well, I drifted. I went back to my old ways and threw everything I had at being worthy of the promotion, Minato-sama trusted me with.."

Yamato looked up then, finally meeting Kakashi's eyes, expression furtive as a thought occurred to him.
"I never once betrayed your trust, Kakashi I swear it. Obito heard nothing of you from me." It was true. Besides the odd childish grumble after missions or training, he had been overly careful in what he shared, keeping both of them divided in his head.

[scarecrowboy]

"I wouldn't doubt you for a moment."

Kakashi smiled gently, his one open eye creasing as the folds of the mask moved with his expression. Despite his words, he was incredibly relieved. The fact that Yamato had found out what happened had put a lead weight into his stomach, worried that the younger man might have lost all faith or respect he had for Kakashi.. To hear that even now Yamato still held him in high standing made Kakashi feel good, if a little bashful.

"But you know, you were worthy of that promotion long before I left ANBU."

[mokutonno]

Yamato relaxed, relieved that Kakashi wasn't angry or worst of all, felt betrayed at the information he'd withheld, but promptly blushed at the praise.

"..Senpai." It was admonishing, but fond and he smiled softly as another sore coil of worry unwound and let him breathe a little easier.

"It certainly would have been easier to convince the rest of ANBU of that if it had happened before.."
Yamato shook his head wonderingly at the lengths he'd had to go to, but honestly couldn't regret any of it.

[scarecrowboy]

Kakashi took a moment to think about that, and again mourned the uselessness of his arms at that moment. If he could move he wasn't certain what he'd do, but as he looked up at Yamato the answer came to him in words rather than in an action.

"Why did you cut your hair?"

[mokutonno]

"Oh, uh.."
It was the last thing that Yamato had expected Kakashi to ask, but he supposed it had been quite a drastic change overall and he rubbed self consciously at the back of his neck and resettled his blanket before replying.

"..I guess something had to change. Too many of the Shinobi I was supposed to be commanding, still saw me as your Kouhai, as someone that didn't measure up.." A little self depreciating of course, but not very far from the truth. Yamato's first mission as captain had been an upward struggle and in a frustrated rage, he'd taken a Kunai to his own hair and cut away the last childish thing about himself.

He sighed and offered a sheepish looking smile "I had to become someone new and without it, no one assumed I was that same obedient boy that sat at your feet in the common room any more.. It was enough to confuse them, to make them re evaluate me."

[scarecrowboy]

Kakashi went quiet at that. Yamato hadn't outright blamed him, but he felt the responsibility sag heavy on his shoulders. He knew that Tenzou's long hair had been something the two had bonded over, and Kakashi betraying Tenzou's trust - while not the sole reason - had assisted in it's absence now.

He stayed silent and simply nodded, not wanting to insult Yamato with an apology now of all times.

"I should have handled it better," he admitted quietly and rather suddenly, like it was an afterthought. "I should have talked to someone. You, Obito, Gai.. I shouldn't have shut myself in like I did. You all trust me inexplicably, I should have shown you all that I feel the same by telling you the truth."

[mokutonno]

Yamato nodded, expression morphing into a pleased smirk at Kakashi's admittance.

"And it only took us almost killing each other to get here. How's that for personal growth?"
It was targeted at both of them; Yamato himself having a lot to answer for in regards to terrible communication, but he felt light enough to joke about it.

"I'm going to hold you too that though, Senpai. You've got two others on that list to talk to and I won't let you forget it."
It was said while fussing with his own blanket and rearranging himself to take up the small portion of bed that Kakashi wasn't occupying, curling around the older mans injured side so as not to hurt him further.

[scarecrowboy]

Kakashi let Yamato cushion himself beside him - not that he had much choice given that he couldn't move - and sighed slightly at the gentle order. He knew Yamato was right and that a talk with Obito and Gai was unavoidable, and while the idea was much easier to consider now that his thoughts were a little more orderly he still wasn't entirely happy with the thought of it.

But he and Yamato were on better terms, and he was on a better track with his own emotions, so.. this was better. He pressed his head against Yamato's, leaning lightly on him and enjoying the contact he always somehow managed to find himself missing since he left ANBU.

[mokutonno]

Yamato absently tucked the blanket round both their shoulders and burrowed into the contact, tucking his nose against the curve of Kakashi's jaw with a sigh.

"Rest first though.." He yawned as if to illustrate the point, the events of the day finally taking their toll "Because I think I could sleep for a week and still be tired.." The words trailed off into a drowsy murmur as Yamato relaxed, settling comfortably against the bed and Kakashi's side.